Brown eyed girls: tag
by teaandcookies1000
Summary: Jane thinks about what to do next... maybe multichapter? :)
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys:) Since there's stil no new extended promo I decided to write what I'd like to happen in the next episode;) Let me know whether I should continue or not...;)**

It was cold outside and Jane was glad that he had his airstream parked right in front of the hospital. He opened the door and got into it to drive to the FBI parking lot since that was where he was going to spend the night.

Jane sat down in the driver seat and started the engine when he noticed that it was beginning to rain outside and small drops of water covered the front window.

After turning on the lights he drove off to where he initially came from.

He was confused and angry and he was hurt.

He hadn't felt that kind of pain in a long time and had almost forgotten how it felt and he had to admit that he hadn't missed it.

But what was this feeling? Was it hate? Was it sadness? No. It felt different.

Jane didn't really pay attention on the road, but he knew the way so it wasn't a big deal.

When he finally arrived at the parking lot he was aiming to get to, right in front of the FBI building he closed the curtains and looked into his empty fridge, still hoping to find something there. He had known that it was empty, but he still did it out of habit.

Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to go to a grocery store once a while and not only live from the pick-up truck's food.

But he just didn't ever feel like going outside and doing stuff like that.

This had gotten much worse since a certain person had entered his life. This certain person was Agent Marcus Pike from the FBI Arts Department. He knew that Pike was a good guy, he hadn't really gotten to talk to him yet though... All he knew that he made Lisbon happy and for him that was all he needed to know.  
He certainly must be a better man than him at least for Lisbon. She deserved to be with a good man, he had even told her that and he really wanted to be that man! He realized it more and more every minute he thought about it, but he wasn't good enough! He had hurt her, he had basically controlled her life and still owed her a lot of apologies for stupid things he had done in the past 12 years or so...

And then he had asked her to come here. The biggest thing he had ever asked her to do. It had been the most selfish thing he had done so far.

So far, because if he wouldn't do an even more selfish thing soon he would probably lose her forever. She would be gone and he wouldn't ever see her again, or jst occasionally. This was the exact opposite of what he actually desired.

He wanted her, to be with her every day, wake up next to her, go to bed with her and be there for her all the time.

He needed her, he didn't want her to go...

She had thrown it at him like a fist-punch. Of course that hadn't been her intention, but it just was a huge surprise for him. A not very appreciated surprise but what could he do... He needed her to be happy, needed to see that she found what she wanted so badly! It was as if he was hoping for a character's happy end in a TV show or a book.

She said she was happy and he had believed her so he had just said that whatever made her happy would make him happy too.

He had lied. The whole conversation had been a huge lie and now that he looked back at it and reversed it in his head he realized that he hadn't been the only one who had lied.

It was so clear now!

The looks, the too big smiles, the adding of words and the uncertainty... He knew her so well he could read her mind easily. Just like an open book.

So why hadn't he noticed it before?

Why did his brain stop working so often lately when she was around?

Since when wasn't he able to control his emotions?

What had happened to him?!

Although it was so hard to admit and so hard to say to himself and others, he just knew...

He had fallen in love. Madly, deeply.

And he had to do something or else he would regret it forever. He had always thought she would be there forever, waiting for him, being ready anytime he was and he didn't ever think about it going any other way. Well, looked like he misjudged the situation.

And... he needed a plan.

A damn good plan! Because she would need good arguments...

Actually there was only one big thing he could say that would change it all.

He knew the words, he knew they were true, he just had to make sure that it wouldn't be the wrong decision. That he wouldn't ruin her life, that she wanted him too.

Jane put aside the cup of tea he had made while he was thinking about his love life and his future and decided to go shower and get ready for bed.

The warm water made him relax and he could think about what he was going to do and when he was going to do it.

Lisbon hadn't said anything about the time of their departure if they indeed moved to DC together, but it could be too late any day. Of course she would need time to think about it and she would need time to finish the thing with P... But what if she said no to him? What if she had fallen in love and didn't want him anymore?

What if he had pissed her off so much that she wouldn't want to stay with him?

What would he do then?

He didn't know.

Jane just hoped that his interpretation of her facial expressions hadn't mislead him.

Should he tell her tomorrow? Should he ask her tonight?

After turning off the water and getting into his dry clothes he decided to do it now.

Now or never.

He knew that he would change his mind if he didn't do it now. He would overthink it all and he would get insecure, he wouldn't do it.

So he got into the driver's seat once again and drove off.

Fortunately he knew where she lived and so it wasn't difficult for him to get there.

When he arrived- he had managed stay convinced of his plan- he noticed that her lights where still on...


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all for the super nice and encouraging reviews and here is the next chapter. Writing this broke my heart... Man those two are killing me. Anyway, I hope u like it and as always, let me know what you think:) **

Should he just knock?

Maybe it wasn't a good Ide..yes it was a good idea! He needed to be convinced of his plan or else it could go terribly wrong.

Since he had felt like needed something to give to her because otherwise he would've felt completely stupid for just showing up at her door and demanding to be let in, he had stopped at a little Asian restaurant and had picked up some noodles and rice.

She had a nice house! Big, with a porch on the front and big windows pointing towards the little garden. It must be beautiful in the morning when the sun rose but now she had drawn the curtains since it was already 11pm. He had never been inside before and didn't know that there was something Lisbon hid in the backyard of her house.

He parked the airstream on the side of the road, got out walked towards her door.

He played with the warm paper bag in his hands and went up the stairs of the porch looking around him to see if there was anything that would keep him from going inside... but he told himself that he was just being nervous and that he shouldn't be so weak. He had killed his worst enemy with his bare hands, not that it was something he was proud of, but he should be able to talk to his best friend and the woman he loved! It couldn't be that hard.

He knocked.

He waited.

He was getting more and more nervous.

Was he ready for this? More important: was she?

The door opened and Lisbon slipped out to him into the dark, the door just opened a small gap. She wore a black jacket, a white shirt, black trousers and cute carpet slippers.

Looking at him curiously she asked: "Jane? What's the matter?"

"Uhm... we need to talk."

He put his weight from one foot to the other, he was as nervous as the first time he had asked a girl out.

But he didn't have anything to lose, did he?

If he did nothing...he would lose her.

If he did it wrong...he would lose her too.

But if he said the right words, did the right things...she would be his.

"Ok..." She answered looking at the bag he had still in his hands.

"Oh, that's for you, if you want. It's take out."

She looked a bit confused but took the bag."Thanks I guess."

"It's messy inside, don't be..."

"Don't worry Lisbon" he interrupted her. "Doesn't matter."

They got inside and Lisbon closed the door behind them.

"Where's Pike? Or should I say Marcus?"he didn't mean it to sound arrogant, but it kinda did.

"He's got a case... Undercover and stuff.." she didn't look at him while she was talking and played with a loose thread on her jacket.

Jane looked around and saw that there were a few things standing around in the house that didn't look like they belonged where they were located at the moment. Some clothes were thrown over the rest of a chair and there was a box standing on the table next to a very comfortable looking couch.

Also, there was a bag standing near the door, open and he could see a piece of a bra look out. It must be the bag she used when she was staying at Pike's..

"Let's sit down maybe? I'll just get us forks for the food."

She went to the room that must be the kitchen and Jane sat down on the couch, thinking about what he was going to do next.

It wasn't an everyday situation to declare one's love.

Lisbon came back with the two forks in her hands and sat down next to Jane. They weren't sitting really close, but close enough that he would be able to lean over...

"So what do you want to talk about? Have you thought about DC...and ...me?"

She sounded so insecure, so hurt, that Jane immediately felt sorry for what he was going to do.

"Lisbon there is...there is something I want you to know." He managed to get the words out with almost no stuttering.

She looked up to him and he kept staring at his hands. He was fiddling with his ring again.

"Before you go you have to know that... that I would miss you terribly... I really hope that you stay. And I want to tell you that I know that you think...you think that you are in love with him and that he is the right man for you but he's not.

Hell he doesn't even know that you hate stuff like shows! You either fall asleep or you drink a little more than usually to stay excited."

She looked at him, her eyes big out of surprise. Was this what she had hoped would happen in the last few years? Cause it seemed like it.

"I know that I am being selfish and childish, but I need you to know that he is not your only choice! You don't have to go with him just because he offers you a family, a standard life something safe...

Lisbon..." he looked up to see how she was reacting "...you have a choice now!"

Lisbon's facial expression couldn't have been any more obvious. It was a mixture of pure joy, astonishment and shock. But after a short time it changed rapidly.

"Lisbon?" he asked carefully.

Why did she look so sad all of a sudden? Had he said the wrong thing? It had been a terrible idea, hadn't it?

He needed to stay focused on the only thing that mattered now.

Lisbon rose her head and looked at him with a gaze full of desperation and sorrow.

"Jane, what should I do now?" she asked him after a few seconds. Her voice was shaking and broke away after the first few words. Sitting there and burying her head in her hands she looked like a little child that had lost its favorite toy.

"I'm sorry, I am so sorry, Lisbon"


End file.
